Happy Friday to All! Today you are in for a special treat. A friend of mine, we'll call her {The General}, has a true story to share about dating {a 25 year-old} in the 21st century.
The {Back Story}:
{The General} has been seeing this guy, we'll call him {The Soldier} for a few months. He's 25, she's 32. She's quick to point out that that's a seven year age gap. Her philosophy is that all relationships teach you something {true} - and they might just be good for one thing {sex?}.
As told by {The General}:
I got a {mere} four hours of sleep the night before last because {The Soldier} snored all night...well and we had s*x three times. So yesterday, I was really looking forward to going home to an empty house and spending the night being mellow {catching up on sleep}. HOWEVER…
Before I left for work, {The Soldier} asked if he could stay a little later and do one load of laundry. I said sure so, when I left for work he was still at my house. I told him to be nice to my dog and to text me when he was done his laundry and leaving my house. I never received {that text}. Why? Don't worry. I soon found out. When I walked through my door at 5pm {HE WAS STILL THERE}. Did he ask me if he could stay all day? No. Did he actually do {that} one load of laundry? No. He played video games and watched TV…all day. I was so irritated, tired and cranky - I just wanted to be alone. Instead I had to have a {fun} conversation with {The Soldier} about BOUNDARIES and why staying at my house all day {while I am AT WORK} is not appropriate. I was as {kind} as I could possibly be given my lack of sleep and {complete} exhaustion. After we had that {fun} conversation he was completely mortified which of course made me feel like a jerk. So I made some dinner {nachos}, poured some wine {red} and we had s*x {twice}. We watched a little TV {CSI} and ate ice cream straight from the containers {yum}.
End of story? Nope.
He actually {DID} do something beyond watching tv and playing video games all day. Are you ready for this? Prepare yourselves… I am {dead} serious. Get ready...
{He. Shaved. His. B*lls. In my bathroom…In my shower to be more specific.} GROSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So, on top of being exhausted, I had to pretend to like his completely {bald} makeover. “Wow, your p*nis looks really big now, babe. And your b*lls are so big! I love your new look.” Yes, those words actually came out of my mouth. As I said earlier, I felt bad about our {talk} on boundaries so I was trying my hardest to be {The NICE General}.
This is what dating a 25-year-old entails. Great s*x...but this crap as well.
L.O.L
xoxoxo,
{The General}
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