I lost my sweet {Baby Girl} very suddenly two weeks ago. And when I say I, I mean we {Me}, {The BF} and {The X}. {Baby Girl} was my puppy, my love, my best friend and a member of my family. I loved her so much and so unconditionally that I can't begin to understand what my life will be like not having her to love and care for any more.
I am lost.
I think that one of the things that is most difficult to explain, especially to those who do not own pets, is how much it really does hurt to love someone{thing} so much and then to suddenly {very suddenly} lose that member of your family.
Your routine changes.
You are not needed like you used to be needed.
Your bed feels empty.
There is an empty space where her ken ken {kennel} used to be.
You are careful when sitting down on the couch or the bed, so as not to squish her. Then you remember, she isn't there.
Your life changes. In a blink.
{Baby Girl} was with me in a time that I needed her most. I hate that I had to say good-bye so early. So soon. {Baby Girl} helped me learn responsibility. She taught me what is was to care for something, what is was to have something completely depended on me for survival. {Baby Girl} counted on me.
{Baby Girl} got me through a tough time in my life. She was there for me when me and {The X} broke up. She gave me reason to live in my darkest days. She gave me love when I was lost. She sat with me while I cried. She showed me that I was not alone.
{Baby Girl} was with me when I rediscovered myself. She enjoyed taking long walks with me. She liked sitting on my stomach while I was doing sit ups. She liked breathing in my face, licking it and getting in my way while I was trying to exercise on the floor of my studio apartment.
{Baby Girl} kept me and {The X} connected. Our mutual love for her, helped us to rediscover and reaffirm our friendship with each other.
{Baby Girl} was there for me to talk to when I got home from work. And she was there when I started dating again. She was a great excuse to go home to if the date wasn't going well ;-). And she was okay with me using her in that way {more cuddle time for her after all}. She liked hearing about my dates {at least I like to think she did}. She was a great judge of character when I started seeing {The Bus Rider} who then became {The BF}. She fell for him immediately which helped me know it was okay for me to fall for him too.
She had the softest ears. She loved guarding from the window. She hated getting her nails trimmed. She {always} pulled on her leash. She loved running at my parents farm. And testing out her bark against {big} dogs and {ugly} dogs, especially when she knew that her humans were near by to protect her. She was a stubborn {little} brat, that refused to be {potty} trained. She peed and pooped...almost immediately...in every new house or building that she entered. She had a hilarious way of always needing to poop in the middle of a crosswalk...when the light was about to change. Her ears bounced {up and down} when she walked. She smelled like a bag of {stale?} fritos. She loved sleeping in her human's nooks - between our legs or arms. She loved the smell of {arm} pits. She loved to burrow. She loved laying in the sun...indoors. She hated her ken ken. Her breath smelled {really} bad. She hated wearing her 'bra' {harness} but loved wearing her jack jack in the winter. Winter, for {Baby Girl}, lasted 12 months a year. She peed on your bed if you ignored her for {too} long. She had {legs} that went on for seconds and a {body} that went on for days. She was a {fat} girl trapped in a {thin} girls body. She had {loose} skin. She loved treats. Sometimes I would eat crackers and purposefully drop crumbs on her head because it made me laugh and she looked cute. She was a self-feeder that was not overweight {unheard of in the dachshund world}. She made the most adorable {squeaking/squealing} noises when she {really really} missed you and was {finally} reunited with you {whether it be that she was separated from you for days or minutes}. She did {not} like standing on cold cement. She destroyed every. single. toy. she. ever. owned. She was a {lap} dog, who sometimes would choose to sit really far away from you...which would make you wonder what was wrong with {you}...She loved sitting up high {on top of couches, windows}. She loved sitting on her {hind} legs. She hated being left out of anything...especially {dinner} time. She did {not} like bubbles. She hated her own bath time {and ours}. She was very photogenic and may be the most photographed puppy who will ever live. She was scared of {cats}, but she loved {to eat} cat poop. True. Story. She loved to lick our legs when we got out of the shower. She loved to dump her water bowl out to get our attention. She made me laugh so hard I would {cry} and cry so hard I would {laugh}. She loved... to be loved.
And she loved her humans. My gawd. Did she love her humans.
She will be in my heart forever.
Goodbye sweet baby girl. Rest in peace.
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| {Baby Girl's First Photo} |
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| Goodbye {Baby Girl} |
xoxo,
Elle
