Elle and a {New} Name

{The Bus Rider} and I 'defined our relationship.' Whether he wanted to or not. {I win}. So I've decided to give him a new name!

Everybody, meet...{The Boyfriend}! Yay. Here are some fun facts about him. 

1. He smells real nice.
2. He makes delicious guacamole.
3. He does not like soda very much.
4. He does like beer and 'good' tequila.
5. Sometimes he interrupts me when I am talking. And he says or asks something completely off topic.
6. I like his body {and his brain}.
7. Sometimes he has to wear a pager.
8. He does not have a peg leg.
9. He likes to water ski.
10. He does not like to lose.
11. He is {very} handsome.

You wish he was your boyfriend too. But he's not. He's mine. So there.

xoxo,
Elle

Elle and {Defining the Relationship}

Things are going well with {The Bus Rider}. So well in fact, that I decide I don't want him seeing anyone else. Which means that I can't see anyone else. Holy shit. I wasn't expecting that to happen so fast.

I wouldn't feel the need to talk about it with him, but I don't want him skanking all over town giving away the good stuff to just anyone. I want it all to myself. I keep checking OkCupid so I can see the last time that he logged in. It's not every day, but it's enough where it's keeping me guessing. I'm hoping that he's just logging in to see if I have been logging in. What a mess. 

I can't seem to get a read on this guy. And my job is reading people all day. So that's awesome.

Anyway, I feel like I need to say something. After I returned from Portland, he left for 'Bama. And the day he returned from 'Bama, I was leaving for Bellingham. Seriously. Can we somehow manage to be in the same city for more then a few days at a time? Guess not.

I decided that something needed to be said. And I've found that guys are {pansies} when it comes to 'talks' like this. So I knew if something was going to be said, it was going to have to be said by me. And I didn't want him going on dates with some other OkCupid floozies while I was out of town, so I knew it had to be said tonight. {Ugh.}

Have I mentioned that I'm awkward? I bet y'all can tell that this is going to go well...

I decide I just need to get it over with. The second I see him. {After I hear about his trip of course.}

So we go to dinner. I chicken out.

We go on a walk. I chicken out.

We go back to his place. We watch some TV. And when I say we, I mean he watches TV...all I'm thinking about is how do I start this conversation? Isn't this what scares dudes away?

I chicken out...again. {Chicks are cute though, right?}

In my defense, I've been out of the game for six years. Yes. Six. Sure I went on some dates. I met some {weird} guys. But not one {weirdo} that I was interested in seeing...exclusively.

And what the fuck do you call it these days? There's dating and dating {I see dating and dating as two separate things. Am I right?}. There's hooking up, hanging out, seeing each other, seeing each other exclusively, boyfriend, man-friend, in a relationship, in an exclusive relationship, friends {my mom introduces all my siblings and my significant others as friends - 'This is Elle's friend, {The Ex}'...thanks Mom}. There's friends with benefits, seeing where it goes, kicking it. The list goes on. And on. And on.

In the end, I decide I want to see him. Exclusively. {In other words, you're my boyfriend. But I won't use that word so as not to scare you away. Sucker!}. I hope he's on board with it. And unfortunately there is only one way for me to find out. Time to man-up!

The TV show comes to an end. And I realize it's now or never {and by never I mean next week. But I want to lock this down.} And I'm {not} having this conversation in the bedroom. I want him to pay attention to what I'm saying. Know what I mean?

Sooooo. I tell him I have something I want to talk to him about. He looks terrified. Shit. This isn't going the way I planned. {Good work, Elle!}. I slip him this piece of paper.

Please don't check no.

Okay, I wish I had slipped him that note. That would have been rad.

I can only imagine how awkward I was. It makes me cringe to think about it. Like watching Kate Gosselin on Dancing with the Stars. Seriously. No. Seriously. 

Train Wreck.

What do I say to him you ask? I ask him if he is seeing anyone else. He turns the question back on me. And I answer???? {WTF - Is he some sort of word ninja? If I'm the one doing the asking, then shouldn't he have to be the one who answers first?!}

Anyway, the {Word Ninja} finally responds after I lay my heart on the line. Hooray! He's not seeing anyone else! It turns out he was logging into his OkCupid account to see if I was logging in. Oh the joys of online dating! {Meant. To. Be. Right?!} So now when someone asks me about my dating life...I can say I'm seeing someone...exclusively. Right?

Wait, does this mean I need a new tag line on my blog? Well, shit.

xoxo,
Elle

Elle and {Facts}

Couple of things:

1. My eHarmony subscription ends today. What a ride. Fact: After {The Dreaded Friend Match}, I'm definitely going to let it lapse.

2. My OkCupid account is still active. I'm still talking to a few guys, but I think my interest lies elsewhere. Is it too soon to be thinking that? Fact: I'm new to this game.

3. {The Engineer} is still texting me. I haven't responded in a few weeks. When I stopped responding we'd been communicating for over a month and he still hasn't asked me on a date? Fact: I'm not looking for a pen pal buddy. 

But I'm not paying eHarmony to find me one...

4. In the same week {but different days}, {The Bus Rider} headed to California for a work thing and I headed to Portland with my girlies. I had a great time with the girls, {I always do}, but my heart went pitter-patter at the thought of spending time with him again. Fact: Absence makes the heart grow fonder.

5. I forgot how much effort it takes to pack a shack pack. Fact: Shacking up in college was easier when you could do the walk of shame instead of the bus ride of shame.

xoxo,
Elle

Elle and {Wine}

After I passed {The Bus Rider's} 'normally off-limit questions test' on our second date, he invited me to attend a wine party that his high school buddy was hosting on Saturday night.

As Saturday approached, I started freaking out a little. Last time I saw this guy, I was a little tipsy. And my mouth was all over his. Like all over. {Oh God, were they sloppy kisses?} I've always had a boyfriend. I've never been 'dating' someone, much less multiple people at once. If I'm kissing {The Bus Rider}, am I allowed to be kissing other guys? Talking to other guys? Seriously? How does this work?

Welp, I figure I'll find out.

He swings by right on time and opens the car door for me {Swoon. Seriously gentlemen, take note. Open a door for us, we're clay in your hands.}

I've never been one who particularly enjoys meeting new people, but needless to say the evening was fun.

When the party ended we headed across the street to Gasworks Park to lay under the stars {and suck face for a while. What? It's true.}

Want to?

As we headed back to the car he asked if I wanted him to drop me off at my place or head over to his. And I'm sorry, but you'll never know how I replied. ;-)

xoxo,
Elle

Elle and {Drunk Texting}

Alright. By the time Friday rolled around, I was exhausted. After getting a mere minutes of sleep on Wednesday night, Thursday was a wash and by the time Friday arrived, I was ready for the weekend.

I started throwin back brewskies at 3 at the monthly party at my place of business. By 4 I was ready for happy hour. I grabbed some of the girls from work and we headed across the street to Blush {I don't recommend...} for a liquid dinner.

Awwwhhh. {Liquid Courage}. Such a beautiful thing. After tossing back some more of the good stuff and some encouragement from my happy hour buddies, I send {The Bus Rider} a text message. 

Without liquid courage, I'm not sure I'd have any courage at all...

He ends up meeting up with us and soon after my friends take off {rude, but at the same time, I'm kinda glad they did.} The evening ends up somewhat similarly to our last night. Only this time we ride the bus home...together? You'll never know.

 This counts as our third date, right?

xoxo,
Elle

Elle and {PDA}

I left off with telling y'all about my hot date at the zoo with {The Dutch Guy}. We had a great time, but come Monday I found out he had some x-girlfriend drama that I just didn't want to get involved in. Ugh. The older we get the more baggage we have. Rad.

After the completely awkward end of my date with {The Bus Rider}, I was surprised but excited when he asked if we could meet for happy hour later this week. This guy doesn't mess around. I have to admit I'm intrigued because he appears to be looking past my complete awkward and uncomfortableness. How is this possible? I distract myself with my awkwardness...how is {HE} looking past it?

This is what the end of our first date looked like.
Seriously...

I digress. He offered to meet me in my neighborhood this time {cute}. I figured I'd take him to the spot where I've dragged many of my other dates - Spur.

Wednesday roles around and I happen to have a pretty crappy-ass day at work. I'm running late. It's raining. By the time I get to my house to quickly freshen up, he's already at the bar and probably annoyed with me that I'm running late. Which makes me sweat. Which is attractive. So that's awesome.

Spur is pretty packed for a Wednesday but we snag a table. I had eaten a late lunch, and decided I'd get right to the hard stuff...if you consider red wine hard...he ordered gnocchi {and pronounced the "G"{cute}} and some sort of fancy man drink {a Manhattan?}. He gobbled down his meal like he hadn't eaten in days. {Bless his heart}.

We settled in and the conversation came easy. He lead the conversation, which I appreciate. I hate having to feel like I am working so hard. He dives right into some topics "you typically avoid on the first few dates." Religion & Politics. This made me giggle on the inside. We seem to be on the same page. However, I try to push the conversation elsewhere. I don't really know him, and I'm not sure if these are topics that he'll get all worked up about. I don't want tears or yelling on our second date...Right?

The next thing I know a few hours have passed. I look down and realize he's holding my hand. After being in a relationship for five years with {The X} - where we rarely touched in public - this feels different. But it feels okay. I realize I am a little tipsy. And by a little I mean a lot. He's sitting across the table from me and says he feels far away. He asks if he can come sit next to me, and I laugh on the inside. I know, I just know, that he is thinking of me sitting 3 miles away from him in his living room on our first date.

He moves to my side of the table where I decide I should come clean about the bus ride. I think I kinda freaked him out by alluding to the fact that I knew him a little better then he knew me. After I finally told the whole story, he seemed a little relieved and found it funny. I thought to my {tipsy} self, well Elle, this is a good sign.

I can tell he's about to kiss me but he's so adorable that he asks without really asking. This is of course {too} cute. But it also makes me sweat. I don't want our first kiss to be at Spur! But it happens and it's nice. And I think to myself, this guy is kind of adorable.

Spur ends up closing at 11, so we head across the street to the Bath Tub Gin Co. We arrive at the Bath Tub Gin and cozy up into a corner. I'm sucking face with this guy. In a bar. At 11pm. On a school night. {What, you weren't expecting me to write that?} Who is this girl, I keep thinking? I don't do this on second dates, much less in public! Well, whoever she is, I decide I like her.  And I decide I like like this guy whose bringing this girl out in me.

{The Bus Rider} keeps trying to end the date back at my place. He's a little broken-hearted because I told him that I don't particularly enjoy dancing. He tells me we should close the tab, head back to my place, turn on some music and dance. I can't help but think the dance he's thinking of is the horizontal mambo. Sorry {Bus Rider}, that just ain't gonna happen on the second date ;-). Luckily I planned ahead. I knew that if I got tipsy, my inhibitions would be lowered and I might be prone to making decisions that I wouldn't normally make in this kind of a situation. I purposefully left my home a bit of a mess, so we couldn't 'end up at my place' at the end of the evening doing a second date version of the horizontal mambo. Internet high-five!

He may not want to high-five over this,
but I'm a lady, and I do!

We end up shutting down the Bath Tub Gin Co., and he walks me home to my place. He hails a cab and we do a little more kissing against it for a healthy handful of minutes. I'm cracking up on the inside. I realize it took us nearly 30 minutes to walk two and a half blocks. Wow. What were we doing on that short walk home? I tell him my chin is red/raw and he apologizes. He tells me he thinks I'm cute, and I quickly forget about my red/raw chin.

I'm not ready to close my OkCupid account, but as I'm getting ready for bed I think to myself, yeah, I kinda like this guy.

xoxo,
Elle

Elle and {The Dutch Guy}

As ya'll know I signed up for okcupid.com since eHarmony failed me with {The Dreaded Friend} Match and I decided paying to meet me some men {husband candidates} wasn't jiving with my {Elle} style.

So I met {The Bus Rider} and we had a lovely little adventure together that commenced with me listening to him recount our date to his buddy on King County Metro Bus #26. Good times were had by all.

In true Elle style, I never put all my eggs in one basket and I had another date lined up that weekend with an okcupid match.

{The Dutch Guy} and I had been talking for several weeks by now but we hadn't had a chance to meet up due to scheduling conflicts. One thing that I thought was especially nice about him was that he wanted to talk on the phone before we met. He insisted. I was terrified, as I barely talk on the phone with my family and think that all phone conversations are horribly awkward. Especially with people you've never met. But we had a great rapport via email and texting and I wasn't going to let one little phone conversation get in the way of meeting this man.

He called me on a Thursday and the phone conversation went fine. Better then fine actually. We talked for about an hour but it only felt like five minutes. This is good right?

He suggested we meet in person. At the zoo.

Every person I consulted with thought this was particularly odd except for me and my good friend {The Meow}. I can always count on {The Meow} to be supportive.

{The Dutch Guy} offered to pick me up which I thought was very sweet, but I thought it would be better to bus it...that way I didn't feel trapped.

My bus arrived at the zoo and there he was waiting for me at the bus stop. How. Sweet. Is. That? He had gotten there early and already bought me a ticket, so there was no awkwardness when it came to paying/entering. But seeing him wait for me at the bus stop made my heart go pitter-patter. This guy is a gentleman, right?

Nine points for {The Dutch Guy}.

The zoo turned out to be one of the very best date spots so far. Conversation came very easy. There were no awkward silences. And if there was ever a lull in conversation, we talked about the animals. I told him a few "must sees" for me and he made sure we spent a lot of time at my favorite exhibits.
We spent several hours at the zoo and went back to my favorite exhibit twice {The Penguins in case you were wondering}. He was the appropriate amount of funny/interesting. And opened every door for me. This guy has class. I. Was. Hooked.

The very sweetest part of our date included a picnic at the end. {The Dutch Guy} had recently been back to Holland to visit his parents and had brought back an entire suitcase full of Dutch treats. He brought a sampling of his favorites on our date and he told me about each of them while we tasted. It was very neat to see his eyes light up as he talked about his home, his favorite food and his family. He asked several questions about me, my family and my life. It was such a relief to be on a date with a guy who took the lead.

We reluctantly realized our date was coming to an end. He drove me home and I got to learn more about another interest of his - racing cars. As he drove me home, he told me he could drop me off a few blocks from my place if I didn't want to tell him where I lived. We had a good chuckle over that.
When we arrived at my place, he told me to hold on for a second - he hopped out of the car and ran around to open my door.

He asked if he could see me again which made my heart pitter-patter again. I realized that this is what a first date is supposed to feel like. I felt a real connection with him and silently celebrated inside my head.

We parted ways with promises to see each other soon. And he sent me a few adorable text  messages later that night.Success! I felt really good about my first two dates from okcupid and couldn't wait to see what would happen next!

I was thrilled that the zoo date had turned out so magical and perfect. I realized it was easier to relax and enjoy myself with distractions. Rather then guzzling cocktails/brewskis and awkwardly looking {I am probably glaring} at each other from across a table. I found it interesting that both guys from okcupid had suggested a similar date - but then I realized that they had been at this longer than me and are probably experts at wooing innocent ladies such as myself.

Happy Virtual Dating!

xoxo,
Elle

Elle and {The Bus Rider} Round II

I left off last time telling you about my date with {The Bus Rider}. Now you get to learn how he got his name.

After parting ways at his corner {like a first class whore - but not really}, I immediately dial my good friend {The Meow} to go over the entire date. I recount everything and she can't help but laugh at me. She tells me he seems very sweet and that I should get together with him again. She talks me off the ledge regarding the touching and tells me her husband was very similar. I decide to text him and thank him for a lovely time. Even though I sent horribly mixed signals, he responds by asking to meet up for happy hour later in the week. I'm definitely excited about that. Glad to meet someone who can look past my awkwardness.

{The Meow} and I get off the phone. I do a little shopping. And then my friend {The Doctor} calls. She worked the night shift the night before and is a little late in waking up. She asks me to catch the bus to her place {She lives in Wallingford} and says she'll shower up and then we can head to U Village.

I hop on the bus and sit towards the front. I'm on the phone with {The Doctor} - she is explaining to me where to get off. As I hang up the phone we are pulling up to a stop - and I hear a familiar voice. I see a familiar jacket. And hat.

Holy Shit.

My date - who I ran away from just over an hour ago - is getting on the bus.

Missed connection on King County Metro

Hello worst nightmare. What the fuck do I do? He {literally} steps over my Ugg and walks right past me and greets his friend.

Oh wait. No. {This} is my worst nightmare. He is {literally} sitting two feet away from me. Oh. My. Fucking. God. I'm pulling my hair in front of my face. I'm laughing hysterically on the inside. So hard that I am crying. I'm thinking - you can't make this shit up. This would {only} happen to me.
Wait. It gets better.

He starts telling his friend about our date. I'm {literally} listening to him recount his version of our first date. And, he's different. More confident. More at ease. I kinda like this side of him. And he's being very kind. If the tables were turned - who knows what I would be saying. I think you all can imagine what {Judgmental Elle} would have to say.

I decide I need to get the fuck of this bus. But I don't want to pull the ringer - for fear that I will draw attention to myself. I wait for someone else to pull the ringer. And practically {run} off the bus. Where I hysterically laugh for ten minutes. Oh, and sweat of course. Seriously. This shit would only happen to me.

Where am I? No seriously. I just got off the bus. And I don't know where I am.

xoxo, Elle

Elle and {The Bus Rider}

Yes. It's true. I've been MIA. Again. But you would be too if this had happened to you.

I signed up for OkCupid because eHarmony has been lacking in quality matches. I lined up two dates pretty quickly. One with {The Dutch Boy} and one with {The Bus Rider}. Juggling all these boys is exhausting. Seriously.

Anyway, {The Bus Rider} lives in the Capitol Hill neighborhood of Seattle. We communicated a bit through OkCupid and I gave him my number. He asked if I want to meet up for dinner, drinks, a walk whatever. A. He royally {sucks} at texting. He takes hours, if not a few days to respond. B. He likes to dance {or so he says from his profile}. These are two things that annoy me. But I push on.
In the meantime, I'm talking with {The Dutch Boy} and eagerly awaiting our date to the {ZOO}.

Perfect.

So I meet {The Bus Rider} on a Saturday - after running 8 miles. Whose idea was it to walk around Capitol Hill after that? Oh yeah, it was his. I ride the bus up to Cap Hill and get off at the wrong spot. Dates off to a good start, right? He meets me on the street. First impression? His jacket isn't buttoned, and it appears to be flowing in the wind. I detect what I think is a limp, and I'm curious to find out if he has a fake leg. Not sure why, I go straight to that conclusion, but remember? I'm judgmental.

After our date, this is how I remember him looking.

We walk around. And my legs are killing me. Like killing me. I keep peeking around each corner looking for a wheelchair.

We go to Starbucks, where he opens the door. For himself. Not me. But he does treat. So I can't complain right? He makes fun of me for ordering iced coffee. And I later regret my choice, when I realize it's three degrees outside. And raining.

We continue on our walk and he brings me up to the water tower at Volunteer Park. It's actually kind of romantic. Did I mention I had to walk up like 100 stairs? And my legs/knees were {killing} me?
Next stop? The Greenhouse. I tell him about nearly killing the plant my Mom gave him. He's not impressed. He buys me a cactus and buys himself one too. I think it's kinda sweet. We continue on our walk and it starts pouring rain.

{And}

He invites me back to his place to get out of the rain and for some {tea}. {What is it with guys and tea with me?!}

Holy shit. How do I say no to this, without letting him know that I am totally creeped out. This is how people get killed, right? I'm gripping my phone. Not sure what to say. And then I hear myself say {sure}. What the fuck?! Who said that? The only thing that made me feel better was knowing that my friend, {The Doctor}, was expecting to see me around dinner time.

We go back to his place and he legitimately seems to be making tea. {I'm keeping my eye on him though.} His place is cute/clean. Turns out his mom helped him decorate {phew}. He turns on the fire place and I'm holding my hands in front of it. He touches my hands. I freak out.
I find a way to pull them away. He does it again. Fuck.

The tea kettle starts whistling, so he gets distracted. I decide to put some distance between the two of us and look out his balcony. The next thing I know he shows up behind me. And then he puts his arm around me. Fuck! I tense up and pull a Macgyver like move to get away from him. I plant my booty firmly at his dining room table and distract myself with some catalogs.

He asks if I'd like to move to the couch. I promise it's not as creepy as I'm making it sound. But I was still freaked out. He sits on one couch and I sit on the other. I wave to him. What the fuck am I doing? Why am I so awkward?

Eventually he decides to use the restroom. So I do too. I tell him I'm meeting a friend in Belltown for dinner and need to get going. He offers to walk me to the bus and I decline {Hi, remember? I'm awkward. What if he tries to touch me again?} He ends up walking me to the corner, where I run away from him.

This isn't where our story ends.

xoxo,
Elle